On the Way to the Undertaker with Gary King

Going to vote tomorrow is like visiting the dentist with a tooth you just know she’s gonna wallop on a long bit, icy-burn the hell out of you with that icy tong, before pleasantly announcing it’s time for you to walk across the lobby to the endodontist to set up that root canal appointment.

Thanks Gary King.  Thanks a hell of a lot.

No, it’s not all your fault, but it’s damn close enough to make my political teeth hurt just thinking about showing up to vote tomorrow.  I’ve put it off, really, avoiding early voting for the first time since early voting began. I’m usually excited to vote.  Ecstatic even.

But I’d rather go to the DMV tomorrow than go to the stupid elementary school after work to stupidly stand in what should be a damn short Democratic South Valley precinct, you stupid Democratic primary winning putz, Gary King.  I’d almost rather go get the root canal.  Especially if you paid for it, which I kinda feel you should.

Thanks Gary King.

I’m really only going to stand in line and vote tomorrow because of Maggie Toulouse Oliver.  She gets it, unlike Gary King.

Thanks Gary King.

How about you take the gloves off and the wallet out next time?  Not that I ever want there to be a next time.  Please don’t let there be a next time.  Promise.

Thanks Gary King.





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